There are several things about dating that have you puzzling. For instance, at one point in your life, you turn down dates that should have ended well. You rarely go on second dates, and the phone calls are less frequent which leaves you wondering why people do not keep in touch. You try to ask your friends as to why their dates do not work out. It is pretty frustrating when you are seemingly chasing the right person only to have them tell you that they are simply not compatible. The good news is that you can turn things around by learning some basic steps to improve your dating skills and ultimately find the love of your life.
One of the basic steps in improving your dating skills is analysis. Think about this. An acquaintance asks you for some advice. Something that would be of great use to you, right? You would address it directly and would probably say whatever you think is correct. If you are in a bar, I am sure you would call it a lot of things; drinks, dances, and so forth. But what you want to be careful of is making hasty presumptions. Let me take you through a few basic steps in analyzing the situation so that you can make a better decision.
Step 1: Know Who You’re Looking For
Under the best conditions, the craziest outfit, most unusual haircut, and perhaps the most Penet Lois reaction, your own best judgment is also going to be the best judge. Before you try to bring a girl home, consider the following: Do you want a girlfriend who is the whole package? I am not referring to tagging her with your baggage; I am addressing the fact that you want to walk out feeling comfortable, attractive, and ready to air-mange and Barbie.
If I am being asked if I would be comfortable with a black guy and a blond-haired, blue-eyed female, would I turn it down? Without hesitation? Perhaps! Or, do you value finding a girl of both tastes? My strong opinion here would be that you should go for a girl who is just fine with you feeling left out, but not so much that you feel inferior. Any girl who thinks she is fine with you should be whisked away to the next church meeting so that you do not have to start your new relationship with tension.
Step 2: The Comfort Essentials
In order for love to feel good and lasting, it needs to be a process. A long period of time of hanging out together, getting to know one another, getting frustrated with your ” Analyst’s” work and generally growing in confidence and comfort so that you do not feel any need to rush. If you have already developed an intense, appreciative hearing about the hobbies she likes and the TV shows she does, focus on those. If you don’t feel that this is totally attending to the needs of your love-life then, perhaps you are in too deep for talk.
Step 3: Further Steps
On the other hand, if you are not all that compatible and you feel regretful about grabbing a relationship so quickly, you can go to the next step. You should be honest about the fact that the relationship is based on physical attraction only. This will preferably trigger happy thoughts. You are sure to hear something in return, such as “Oh,That’s great! How can I get to be ‘that’s-what-she’s-looking-for’?”
Observation is a key tool for love. It’s so easy to rely on appearance, to assume that “if he or she is so unattractive, why are we together?” Stop to consider whether it can possibly be the reason someone is avoiding intimacy. Is there something missing from the happily ever after picture that has stimulated this person’s addiction for blabbering away?
For a relationship to work, you must consider each step carefully. The Internet is full of people with success stories to share. If you are unfortunate enough to have found yourself in the middle, don’t worry. The truth is that there are a lot of people who have found themselves in similar situations.
The next step is to start making the calls to arrange a face-to-face meeting. Just remember that you are absolutely, positively, definitely going to be alone with this very special person. Listen very carefully for some useful hints on how to make this known. When you do finally agree to meet, be yourself and don’t forget that she or he has been waiting for you. Just rely on you instincts.
Another point to keep in mind is that, no matter how flawless someone’s personality is, if the individual lacks basic conformity skills, such as being charming, the relationship will probably not last very long.
Finally, be as polite as you can.
